80+ Biology Jokes | Dirty | High School | Pick Up Lines | Funny | Teachers 2024

Updated on

Impressing people with your knowledge, is excellent, right?

Being intelligent doesn’t mean you are a nerd, you can have an understanding of humor too.

And these biology puns are the best way to prove this.

I have collected a list of one-liners, dirty, funny, and sarcastic biology jokes, as well as pick up lines for you.

Use them and show others your crazy side.  

Dirty Biology Jokes

“Baby, I wish I were DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes.”

“Girl, you’re so hot you denature my proteins.”

Why are men s*xier than women?
“You can’t spell sexy without XY”

What is the fastest way to determine the s*x of a chromosome?
“Pull down its genes!”

What did the conservative biologist say?
“The only cleavage I want to see is at the cellular level.”

Which biochemicals wash up on beaches?

Related: Best Fat Jokes

Are male and female reproductive organs similar?
“No. There’s a vas deferens.”

“A dog and a marine biologist are quite similar. One wags a tail, and the other tags a whale!”

High School Biology Jokes

High School Biology Jokes

Where do hippos go to university?

Why was the amoeba sad?
“His parents just split.”

Why was the mushroom so popular?
“He was a real fungi.”

What do you call an organic compound with an attitude?
“A-mean-o acid.”

What do you call it when your Biology grade is close to an F?

How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam?
“As an itsy bitsy book.”

Related: Best Dad Jokes That Are Actually Funny

What do you call the leader of a biology gang?
“The nucleus.”

Why did the scuba diver fail biology?
“He was below “C” level.”

“A couple of biologists had twins… They named one Jessica and the other Control.”

“I made a DNA joke in my biology class but no one laughed… Guess my thymine was off.”

Biology Puns One-Liners

Biology Puns One-Liners

What do you call an oral hygiene product for the brain?
“Neural Crest.”

What’s a pirate’s favorite amino acid?

Where do you bury dead people?

What is the reproductive area in South America?

What’s the study of real estate?

“We just hired a molecular biologist. Man, is he small.”

What type of flowers does everybody have?

Related: One Liner Jokes For Adults

What do you call cabs which provide drug therapy?

What do you call the union of a sheep and a ram?
“A zygoat.”

How does the nucleus communicate with ribosomes?
“With a cell phone.”

Which s*x hormone hates going west?

What do you get if you give growth hormones to an ant?

Biology Jokes Pick Up Lines

“Girl, your name must be Phylum, because you are above class.”

“Baby, every time i see you, my cardiovascular system gets all worked up.”

“I think my heart just lagged.”

“If I were an enzyme, I’d be helicase so i could unpackage your genes.”

“You must be the one for me, since my selectively permeable membrane let you through.”

“Hey baby, you look so good I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of you!”

“You give me more jolt than a mitochondria!”

Related: Funny Tinder Pick Up Lines

“I wish I were adenine because then I could get paired with U.”

“You’re so cute you make my zygomaticus muscles contract.”

“I wanna stick to you like glue-cose.”

“You are like cholesterol cause you are dangerous to my heart.”

“Whenever I am near you, I undergo anaerobic respiration because you take my breath away.”

Biology Jokes About Cells

Biology Jokes About Cells

What did the cell say when he ran into the table?

What do biologists post on Instagram?

Why didn’t anyone want the biologist’s new book?
“It was a hard cell.”

“… They also take cell-fies!”

Why did the woman break up with the biologist?
“He was too cell-fish.”

“It’s impossible for plants to escape from jail. There’s a wall around their cell!”

Related: Best Saturday Jokes Pun

“If you’ve ever wondered how biologists contact each other, they use their cell-phones!”

“My biology teacher decided to create vocal cords with stem cells. The results really speak for themselves.”

“Two blood cells met and fell in love. Sadly, it was all in vein.”

“A cell stepped on her sister’s toe. The sister said, “Ouch, mitosis!”

Biology Jokes For Teachers

Biology Jokes For Teachers

“The biology teacher is very popular at school. He’s a fungi.”

“Biologists can also be great philosophers. They give fantastic life lessons.”

“Biologists love to play musical instruments. Organs are their favorite!”

“I made a DNA joke in my biology class but no one laughed. Guess my thymine was off.”

“When biologists need to repair something at their house, they study homology.”

“My biology teacher grew human vocal cords from stem cells in the lab, the results…… speak for themselves.”

“The relationship between the Physics teacher and biology teacher in my brother’s school didn’t last long… They had no chemistry et. al.”

Biology Teacher: Everybody draws the female re-productive organ. *One girl felt shy and looked down*. A boy shouted: Mam, she’s copying.”

“In tenth grade, my biology teacher thought our attendance should be represented in our grades. He called it the “tardy grade.”

Related: I Love You Knock Knock Jokes

“My biology teacher asked me to make a diagram of bacteria.”

“When he questioned why I submitted a blank piece of paper, I told him: “It only appears blank because it’s invisible to the naked eye”

What did the biology teacher tell the frog?
“Looks aren’t everything, it’s what inside you that really matters.”

I asked my biology teacher how he makes his class so interesting?
He told me: S*x cells.

“The biology teacher told us our skin is the biggest organ… Here i was thinking it was the one they play in the church down the road!”

The biology teacher asks Johnny if he can describe what a specimen is?
“Sure teach, a specimen is an Italian astronaut!”

Biology teacher: Can anyone name a disease?
Student: I can sir.
Teacher: Well done. Whose next?”

“A biology teacher runs into a bank holding a flower. He says “Everybody on the ground, I have a pistil!”

“My Biology Teacher Asked What ATP is… I replied, “where Native Americans live.”

“I got an F in Biology Class Next time I see my teacher I’m gonna punch her in the balls!”

Related: Funny Jokes To Tell Your Friends

“My Biology teacher told me ants are female The males are called uncles”

“My biology teacher said there is no evolutionary advantage to blue eyes. She must have never heard of the holocaust.”

Funny Biology Jokes

Funny Biology Jokes

Why wouldn’t the scientist go into the haunted house?
“He was too petrified.”

Why do biologists look forward to casual Fridays?
“They’re allowed to wear genes to work.”

How does Juliet maintain a constant body temperature?

Why aren’t students allowed in the biology teachers’ lounge?
“It’s for staph only.”

What do hipster biologists wear?
“Skinny genes.”

How does a marine biologist end a conversation?
“Sea you later!”

What did the femur say to the patella?
“I kneed you.”

Related: Friday Jokes For Office | School | Kids

Why did the biologist break up with the physicist?
“They had no chemistry.”

Why did the bacteria cross the microscope?
“To get to the other slide.”

Why do biologists like to travel?
“It makes them more cultured.”

If you are someone who loves science, and if you are in search of other ways to impress your crush, you can check out our Science Pick-Up Lines.

Moreover, check out these jokes, riddles, and memes on food, love, animal, and holiday to get more ideas to suit different moods and situations.

All the best!

Related Topics:

What Do You Call Jokes
Best Hiking Puns Jokes
Lobster Puns Jokes
Best Laundry Puns Jokes
Really Bad Puns Jokes
Best Back To School Jokes For Kids | Parents | Teachers