We blinked our eyes and Halloween 2024 is here already, kids can not be the only ones to have fun but adults too this holiday.
That’s why we have listed few a dirty, naughty, and insane cheesy Halloween jokes for you guys.
This list includes corny, cheesy Halloween jokes, memes, riddles, and a lot more.
So check out and enjoy these corny Halloween jokes.
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Corny Halloween Jokes
Here are some of the best Halloween corny jokes to have a fun time with your friends and family.
Where does a ghost go on vacation?
“Mali-boo.”
Why did the ghost go into the bar?
“For the Boos.”
What is in a ghost’s nose?
“Boo-gers.”
Why do ghosts go on diets?
“So they can keep their ghoulish figures.”
Why did the policeman ticket the ghost on Halloween?
“It didn’t have a haunting license.”
Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
“Because demons are a ghoul’s best friend!”
Why did the ghost starch his sheet?
“He wanted everyone scared stiff.”
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What does a panda ghost eat?
“Bam-BOO!”
Why did the policeman ticket the ghost on Halloween?
“It didn’t have a haunting license.”
Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
“Because demons are a ghoul’s best friend!”
Why did the ghost starch his sheet?
“He wanted everyone scared stiff.”
Why don’t mummies take time off?
“They’re afraid to unwind.”
Why did the headless horseman go into business?
“He wanted to get ahead in life.”
What kind of music do mummies like listening to on Halloween?
“Wrap music.”
Why don’t mummies have friends?
“Because they’re too wrapped up in themselves.”
What does a panda ghost eat?
“Bam-BOO!”
Why did the ghost quit studying?
“Because he was too ghoul for school.”
What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert?
“I-Scream!”
Where do ghosts buy their food?
“At the ghost-ery store!”
How do you know when a ghost is sad?
“He starts boo hooing.”
What did Dracula say when the witch and the warlock started kissing?
“Get a broom!”
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How do you know you’ve been ghosted?
“The poltergeist doesn’t text you back.”
What’s a ghost’s favorite play?
“Romeo and Ghoul-iet.”
What does a ghost mom say when she gets in the car?
“Fasten your sheet-belts.”
What kind of horse do ghosts ride?
“A night-mare”
What room does a ghost not need in a house?
“A living room.”
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Here are dirty Halloween jokes to make things hot and heavy around the Halloween season.
What’s the most popular dating app for skeletons in 2020?
“The Bone Zone.”
How do two skeletons have s*x?
“By boning all night long.”
Why do skeletons enjoy s*x with dainty women?
“They like to bone a petite.”
How do skeletons make babies?
“They bone.”
Why don’t witches have babies?
“Their husbands have crystal balls.”
Why do the witches hate hanging out with the headless horseman?
“He’s obsessed with getting head.”
Why do witches wear no p@nties?
“For better grip on the broom.”
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What did the vampire say to the teacher?
“See you next period.”
Why can’t the ghost have any children?
“He has a Halloweenie.”
Why are male ghosts attracted to female ghosts?
“Because of their boo-bies.”
Why do Halloween ghosts moan, tremble, and shiver?
“Because of what’s happening under that sheet.”
Why don’t you ever have an unexpected pregnancy when dating a vampire?
“Because they can’t come inside without asking for permission.”
1900: Dracula survived by drinking the blood of v*rgins.
“2019: Dracula dies of hunger.”
What’s unique about s*x with vampires?
“They only come at night.”
What do vampires use to make tea?
“Tampons.”
What is a vampire’s favorite part of s*x?
“Edraculating.”
What do Dracula’s girlfriend and a professional boxer have in common?
“They both go down for The Count.”
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What is Dracula’s porn star name?
“Vlad The Impaler.”
How did the woman learn her boyfriend was a vampire?
“He only came at night and would insist on giving oral the same time every month.”
What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
“It’s a pain in the neck.”
What happens when two vampires meet?
“It’s love at first bite!”
Funny Halloween Jokes For Adults
Why did Dracula take cold medicine?
“Because he was coffin too much.”
What’s a vampire’s favorite ice cream flavor?
“Vein-illa.”
Why do vampires not want to become investment bankers?
“They hate stakeholders.”
Why are vampires bad at art?
“They are only able to draw blood.”
Why did the vampire read the newspaper?
“He heard it had great circulation.”
How do vampires get around on Halloween?
“On blood vessels.”
What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
“It’s a pain in the neck.”
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What’s it called when a vampire has trouble with his house?
“A grave problem.”
How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
“All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.”
What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
“Frostbite.”
What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
“Neck-tarines.”
Why couldn’t the mummy go to school with the witch?
“He couldn’t spell.”
How do mummies tell their future?
“They read their horror-scope.”
Where does a mummy go on vacation?
“The Dead Sea.”
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What do you call Ryan Gosling in a mummy costume?
“Ryan Gauzeling.”
What do you call a mummy covered in chocolate and nuts?
“A Pharaoh Roche.”
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What do you call a witch with a rash?
“An itchy-witchy.”
What’s the problem with twin witches?
“You never know which witch is which.”
How did the witch get around when her broomstick broke?
“She witch-hiked.”
What do you call a witch’s garage?
“A broom closet.”
What kind of food would you find on a haunted beach?
“A sand-witch!”
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What was the witch’s favorite subject in school?
“Spelling.”
What do you call two witches who live together?
“Broom-mates!”
What happened to the witch who flew her broom while angry?
“She flew off the handle.”
Why did the witch take a nap?
“She needed to rest a spell.”
What’s a witch’s favorite makeup?
“Ma-scare-a.”
What do witches get when their shoes are too tight?
“Candy corns.”
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite genre?
“Pulp fiction.”
Why did the pumpkin take a detour?
“To avoid a seedy part of town.”
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How do you mend a jack-o’-lantern?
“With a pumpkin patch.”
What’s the best thing to put into a pumpkin pie?
“Your teeth.”
Why was the jack-o’-lantern scared?
“Because it had no guts.”
Why was the gourd so gossipy?
“To give ’em pumpkin to talk about.”
What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?
“Squash.”
What does a carved pumpkin celebrate?
“Hollow-een.”
Who helped the little pumpkin cross the road?
“The crossing gourd.”
What did the pumpkin say to its carver?
“Cut it out!”
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How does a witch style her hair?
“With scare spray.”
What kind of medicine do witches use on their warts?
“I don’t know, but it’s not working.”
Funny Halloween Jokes For Trick Or Treating
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite Western?
“The Gourd, the Bad, and the Ugly”
Where does a pumpkin preach?
“From the pulp-it.”
How do gourds grow big and strong?
“Pumpkin iron.”
Why did he jack-o-lantern fail out of school?
“Someone scooped his brains out.”
Why don’t zombies like pirates?
“They’re too salty.”
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What’s a zombie’s favorite weather?
“Cloudy, with a chance of brain.”
Why did the zombie become a mortician?
“To put food on the table.”
What do you call zombies in pajamas?
“The sleepwalking dead.”
Why aren’t zombies ever arrested?
“They can’t be captured alive.”
What’s a zombie’s favorite treat?
“You might guess brain food, but it’s actually eye candy.”
What do vegetarian zombies eat?
“Graaaains!”
How do you know if a zombie likes someone?
“They ask for seconds.”
What kind of bread do zombies like?
“Whole brain.”
What is a zombie sleepover called?
“Mass grave.”
What sea do zombies swim in?
“The dead sea.”
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What brand of shampoo do zombies use?
“Head and Shoulders.”
Why don’t zombies eat popcorn with their hands?
“They eat their hands separately.”
Where do zombies live?
“On a dead-end street.”
What’s a zombie’s favorite cheese?
“Zom-brie.”
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What do you call a movie about zombies finding true love?
“A zom-com.”
I hope you loved these silly chessy Halloween jokes, you can also share them with your friends and family.
Moreover, check out these jokes, riddles, and memes on food, love, animal, and holiday to get more ideas to suit different moods and situations.
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