70+ Dirty Jokes To Say To Your Girlfriend | Her | Never Appropriate | Pun | 2022

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Either people love dirty jokes or say they don’t but are lying.

Sharing dirty jokes with your girlfriend is always fun as well as helps you increase the level of intimacy and love.

It’s even more fun when you know your girlfriend would enjoy r rated new and short jokes for adults.

These are some of the best dirty jokes to tell your girlfriend over text or face to face that is only fit for grownups.

So here I present to you the best dirty jokes for her, which will surely make her laugh.

Take a look and pick the suitable new dirty jokes for a guy to tell a girl. Enjoy!

Dirty Jokes To Say To Your Girlfriend Over Text | Puns |2022

Jokes are always fun, especially when you use dirty jokes to say to your girlfriend over text. Take a look and find some of the best dirty jokes for girls. Enjoy!

Dirty Jokes To Tell Your Girlfriend Over Text

What did the toaster say to the slice of bread?
“I want you inside me.”

I’m not a professional photographer, but I can picture us together.

“Give it to me! Give it to me!” she yelled. “I’m so wet, give it to me now!” She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.

Have you ever been to another planet?
“[no.] Wow, we have so much in common!”

Who’s the most popular guy at the n*dist colony?
“The one who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen doughnuts.”

You like pizza, right?
“So why does the round pizza come in a square box?”

What’s the difference between k*nky and perverted?
“K*nky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.”

I love you only on days that end with y.

How do you make a pool table laugh?
“Tickle its balls.”

If you were born in September, it’s pretty safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a bang.

Related: Dirty Jokes For Adults That Are Actually Funny

A n*ked man broke into a church. The police chased him around and finally caught him by the 0rgan.

Why did the sp*rm cross the road?
“Because I put on the wrong sock this morning.”

What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used c0nd0ms?
“One’s a Goodyear. The other’s a great year.”

What is Moby D*ck’s dad‘s name?
“Papa Boner.”

What did one b*tt cheek say to the other?
“Together, we can stop this [email protected]

What do you call an expert fisherman?
“A Master Baiter.”

What comes after 69?
“Mouthwash.”

How do you make your girlfriend scream during s*x?
“Call and tell her about it.”

What do you call a guy with a small p*nis?
“Just-in.”

What is six inches long, two inches wide, and makes everyone go crazy?
“A $100 bill.”

Related: Funny Pun Compliments For Her

How do you spot a blind man on a n*de beach?
“It’s not hard.”

Do you know bees that make milk?
“Boo-bees!”

What would you call a h00ker with her hand up her skirt?
“Self-employed”

If a 3-some is with three people and a 2-some with two, do you now understand why people call you ‘handsome’

If circumcision is done poorly and cheaply, what do you call that?
“A bl00dy rip-off”

When a dick and potato are crossed, what do you get?
“A dictator”

How is a woman and a road alike?
“They both got manh0les”

What do mice and [email protected] people have in common?
“They are both enemies of p*ssies”

‘‘Baby, is it in?’’ ‘‘Not yet.’’ ‘‘Does it hurt?’’ ‘‘A little.’’ ‘‘Let me push it in slowly.’’ ‘‘Still hurts?’’ ‘‘Yeah.’’ ‘‘Damn, let’s try another shoe.’’

Dirty Jokes For Her So Racy You’ll Want to Cover Your Eyes 2022

Here are some of the best dirty jokes for her, no matter the setting, these dirty funny jokes to tell your girlfriend are never entirely appropriate. If you’re bold enough then get her to laugh for sure.

Dirty Jokes For Her

What is a long, wide thing that men carry hanging in front of it?
“Tie.”

What is furry and peeking out of your pajamas at night?
“Your head.”

Hair on the top and hair on the bottom, in the middle a wet slit, what is it?
“The eye.”

What is the first thing a man puts in a woman when they get married?
“The wedding ring.”

It goes in hard and dry and comes out soft and wet. What is it?
“A bubblegum.”

What did one butt cheek say to the other?
“Together, we can stop this crap.”

New Dirty Jokes For Girlfriend Over Text | Face To Face 2022

Here are these jokes for your girlfriend that are newly compiled for you. Pick suitable dirty jokes to tell your girlfriend over text or face to face.

New Dirty Jokes For Girlfriend

What’s the difference between ‘Oooh!’ and ‘Aaah!’?
“About three inches.”

What goes in hard and dry, but comes out soft and wet?
“Gum!”

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

Having s*x in an elevator is wrong on so many levels.

Why do vegans give better head?
“They’re used to eating nuts.”

Why does a mermaid wear seashells?
“Because she outgrew her B-shells!”

I think s*x is better than logic, but I can’t prove it.

What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say as clients leave?
“Thanks for coming!”

Which s*xual position produces the ugliest kids?
“Ask your mum!”

Whats 72?
“69 with three people watching.”

Related: Romantic I love You Puns For Girlfriend

Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack?
“He only comes once a year.”

What is the recipe for Honeymoon Salad?
“Lettuce alone without dressing.”

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
“To get to the bottom”

I wish you were soap so I could feel you all over me.

Short Jokes For Adults (Girlfriend) | Puns |2022

Here are these short dirty puns for her (girlfriend) that are extremely freaky jokes to tell your gf to make things hot and heavy quickly.

Short Jokes For Adults (Girlfriend)

My girlfriend asked me if I smoke after s*x…
“I said I haven’t looked.”

What do you call a person who doesn’t m*sturbate?
“A liar.”

What are the three shortest words in the English language?
“Is it in?”

How did you quit smoking?
“I decided to smoke only after s*x.”

Why did the d*ck go crazy?
“Someone was messing with his head.”

What did the p*nis say to the c0nd0m?
“Cover me, I’m going in.”

What do bridge and s*x have in common?
“If you don’t have a good partner, you better have a really good hand!”

What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
“The s*x drive.”

I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?

What’s the difference between a pr*gnant woman and a lightbulb?
“You can unscrew a lightbulb.”

What’s a 6.9?
“Another great thing screwed up by a p*riod.”

Did you hear about the man who ran in front of a bus?
“He got tired.”

Do you want to hear a joke about my [email protected]?
“Never mind, you’ll never get it.”

What does a h0rny frog say?
“Rub it.”

I hope you have found these new and short dirty jokes to say to your girlfriend or crush to help you enhance the romance between you.

Moreover, you can check out these puns and jokes on love, food, and animals to help you find more ideas on jokes to share with your partner, crush, or friends.

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