91 Hilarious Bread Puns & Jokes That Are Not Crumby 2024

Updated on

Are you looking for bread puns and jokes?

Here we have the best bread jokes that you can share with friends and family to have a fun time with them.

Therefore, we have made these amazing food jokes that are funny and clever bread jokes to use today.

These bread jokes include funny bread pick up lines, sourdough bread puns, bread themed names, dirty butter jokes, and many more.

Have a look and pick suitable jokes about bread that can also be used for birthdays. Enjoy!

Bread Trivia | Jokes For Kids And Adults | Bakery

Here we have collected the best bread riddle puns for kids and adults to have a fun time. Pick suitable jokes about bread. Enjoy!

bread break up with his girlfriend

Why did the loaf of bread break up with his girlfriend?
“The relationship was crumbling.”

How does bread court his sweetheart?
“With lots of flours.”

What did the toast say to the psychic?
“You bread my mind!”

What did one slice of bread say to another after a long day?
“Don’t worry—tomorrow will be butter.”

What does a loaf of bread say to a friend after doing them a favor?
“It’s the yeast I could do.”

What did one slice of bread say to the other before the race?
“You’re toast!”

What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend?
“You deserve butter.”

How do you spot a radical baker?
“They’re always going against the grain.”

What did mama bread say to her kids?
“It’s way past your breadtime!”

What’s the most sophisticated kind of bread?
“The upper crust.”

Why did the aging loaf retire?
“His career was toast.”

Why was the loaf of bread upset?
“His plans kept going a rye.”

What did a slice of bread say after brushing his teeth?
“I’m bready for bed.”

best thing about a bread joke

What’s the best thing about a bread joke?
“It never gets stale.”

What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend?
“You deserve butter.”

What did the banker want from the baker?
“To pump her nickels.”

Why was the slice of bread upset with her husband?
“He told her she was being too kneady.”

Why did the man keep punching his doughy friend?
“To get a rise out of him!”

Why was the chef surprised that anyone like her bread?
“She thought it was crumby.”

Why was the bread actor so unhappy?
“She lost out on a juicy roll.”

What did one bread lover say to the other?
“Before I break down and rye, I want you to know that I loaf you.”

What do bread kids say during hide-and-seek?
“Bready or not, here I crumb!”

How does bread win over friends?
“You can crust me.”

Why does bread hate hot weather?
“It just feels too toasty.”

How does bread woo a lover?
“With lots of flours.”

Why does bread look so bad in photographs?
“It’s just too grainy.”

Butter up your boss.

How do you get a raise at the bread factory?
“Butter up your boss.”

How do you make dog bread?
“Just use collie flour.”

Why was the baker in a bad mood?
“He woke up on the wrong side of the bread.”

What did the bag of flour say when she bumped into the loaf of bread?
“Didn’t I see you yeast-erday?”

Why did the two slices of bread run away from the bakery?
“They wanted to grow mould together.”

What do you say to a piece of toast that’s fallen face down on the floor?
“Butter luck next time.”

Why do we call money dough?
“Because we all knead it.”

Why do dough balls throw great parties?
“Because they always they rise to the occasion.”

What did the butter say to the bread?
“I’m on a roll.”

What did the muffin say to the crumpet?
“You deserve butter than this.”

What happens if a baguette forgets her umbrella?
“She’ll get soaking wheat all over.”

What did the slice of bread say when he broke up with his girlfriend?
“You deserve butter.”

Why did the bread go to the doctor?
“Because it was feeling crumby.”

What did the sliced bread say when it saw the butter and jam on the table?
“I’m toast.”

What do elves make sandwiches with?

How do you say hello to German bread?
“Gluten tag.”

How does bread remember things?
“It uses Toast-It notes.”

How does bread relax after it’s finished baking?
“It loafs around.”

Funny One Liner Bread Puns | Captions

These are the best bread jokes to post funny pics or selfies with matching bread, baking, or baker captions. Pick suitable bread pick up lines, sayings, funny bread quotes on birthdays, etc. Enjoy!

 One Liner Bread Puns For Instagram Captions

“I don’t want naan of that.”

“Oat’s just a matter of time.”

“Bready or not, here I crumb!”

“I loaf you.”

“I don’t want naan of that.”

“You deserve butter.”

“Gotta risk it for the biscuit.”

“You’re toast.”

“Wheat it and weep.”

“You’re the apple of my rye.”

“I adough you.”

“Butter late than never”

“You can crust me.”

“I’m on a roll.”

Funny One Liner Bread Puns

“You’re baking a fool of yourself.”

“Stop loafing around!”

“Don’t be so sour, dough.”

“A legend in the bakin’”

“Baking is a labor of loaf.”

“Don’t worry, you can crust me.”

“Bread is like the sun, it rises in the yeast.”

“That was a breach of crust.”

“What are you doughing right now?”

“I’ve got a butter idea”

“Harry Butter”

Best Word Rhymes Bread Puns | Yeast | Naan

If you looking for bread puns that rhyme with bread or bread-related wordplay then these are perfect to be used. Enjoy!

Funny Bread Puns For Instagram Captions

None/Naan: “A jack of all trades and a master of naan.”

No one/Naan: “Naan’s home at the moment, but you can leave a message after the tone.”

Nan/Naan: “Meet my naan.”

Rain/Grain: “Right as grain.”

Grey/Grain: “Fifty shades of grain.”

Brain/Grain: “Beat your grains out.”

Gain/Grain: “Capital grains.”

Serial/Cereal: “There’s a cereal killer on the loose.”

Surreal/Cereal: “The view from the summit was cereal.”

Stone/Scone: “Leave no scone unturned.”

White/Wheat: “Wheat as a ghost.”

Sweet/Swheat: “Home swheat home.”

Sweat/Swheat: “Blood, swheat and tears.”

Weight/Wheat: “Watch your wheat.”

Wait/Wheat: “Wheat a second…”

We’d/Wheat: “Wheat love for you to join us!”

Word PlayBread Puns Ideas

What/Wheat: “Wheat are you up to today?”

Bred/Bread: “My dog is a pure bread.”

Brad/Bread: “When’s Bread Pitt’s next film coming out?”

Read/B-read: “All I know is what I b-read in the papers.”

Bed/Bread: “Bread and breakfast.”

Bled/Bread: “My papercut bread all over the place.”

Bride/Bread: “Blushing bread.”

Laugh/Loaf: “Loafter is the best medicine.”

Love/Loaf: “The world needs more loaf.”

Do not/Donut: “Donut tempt me.”

East/Yeast: “I’m heading over yeast for a holiday.”

Trust/Crust: “Crust me, I’m a doctor.”

Rusty/Crusty: “My punning skills are a little crusty, sorry.”

Do/Dough: “I dough what I can.”

Pun/Bun: “No bun intended.”

Pit us/Pitas: “He’s trying to pitas against each other.”

Hopefully, these bread puns & jokes are crusty and useful, however, for more funny joke ideas.

Moroever, check out these jokes, memes, and trivia on food, love, and holiday for more fun activities.