Halloween is almost here, and all of us know that pumpkins and Halloween go hand in hand.
Below we have collected a few of the best and coolest pumpkin jokes dirty editions, riddles, and memes to use this holiday season.
These jokes will make your vacation full of laughter.
These holiday jokes include knock-knock jokes, adult jokes, gourd jokes, dad jokes, pick up lines, and more.
So let’s get started.
Table of Contents
Pumpkin Knock Knock Jokes
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Ah, don’t cry, Halloween is just around the corner!
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Butter.
Butter who?
Butter open quick, I have a funny Halloween joke to tell you!
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Abbott.
Abbott, who?
Abbott time you opened this door!
Related: Funny Trick And Treat Jokes
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Oh, I’m sorry….I didn’t mean to make you cry!
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Aida.
Aida who?
Aida the whole pumpkin pie!
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don’t cry old man!
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Harry.
Harry who?
Harry scary monster here to freak you out!
Pumpkin Jokes And Riddles | Puns For Instagram
“Here’s me Squash-ing all hopes of a happy diet this Fall.”
“I love pumpkin spice a latte.”
“Pumpkin spice and everything nice.”
“You’re the pumpkin spice to my latte.”
“Pumpkin spice and chill.”
Related: Halloween Trivia | Easy | Hard
“If you love Fall as much as I do, we’re probably Pumpkin-dred spirits.”
“So… do you want the bad news or the gourd news?”
“Sorry if this photo looks weird, I was a little caught off gourd. “
Funny Pumpkin Sayings That Are Wickedly Clever
“A pumpkin a day keeps the goblins away!”
“I Heard a Pumpkin a Day Keeps the Goblins Away.”
“I’ve been pumpkin iron at the gym.”
“Apples, Peaches, Pumpkin Pie. Soon Your Love Will Be All Mine.”
“Patch you later!”
What happens when you drop a pumpkin?
“It goes squash!”
Related: Best Skeleton Puns Jokes
“I Am the Pumpkin King.”
“It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.”
“I Think About You a (Pumpkin Spice) Latte”
What Do You Get When You Drop a Pumpkin?
“You get squash!”
Pumpkin Food Puns To Mame You The Pun King
“Welcome to the pun-kin patch!”
“Go big or gourd home.”
“What’s cookin’, gourd lookin’?”
“I used a pumpkin to summon ghosts. It was an Ouija gourd.”
“Welcome to the pun-kin patch!”
“I’m a bit of a country pumpkin.”
Related: Best Fall Jokes For Kids
“Hello, gourd-geous.”
“Let’s give ’em pumpkin to talk about.”
“Slipped on a pumpkin. It caught me off gourd.”
“Life is gourd.”
“Don’t gourd breaking my heart.”
Gourd Puns That Are Gourd-Geously Funny | Squash
“We have nothing but gourd intentions.”
“Time to get smashed!”
“Gourd of the rings.”
“When in doubt, gourd it out.”
“My gourd luck charm.”
Related: Funny Halloween Jokes For Adults | Kids
“May the gourds be with you.”
“Gourd Morning friends!”
“The gourd is strong with this one.”
“I let my gourd down.”
“Go big or gourd home.”
“My friends are seriously squash goals.”
“I was caught off gourd.”
“We need to gourd ourselves against diseases.”
Pumpkin Dad Jokes We Can’t Get Enough
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite genre?
“Pulp fiction.”
Why did the pumpkin take a detour?
“To avoid a seedy part of town.”
Where does a pumpkin preach?
“From the pulp-it.”
What does a carved pumpkin celebrate?
“Hollow-een.”
Why was the gourd so gossip-y?
“To give ’em pumpkin’ to talk about.”
Related: Best Halloween Dad Jokes
What did the pumpkins say at happy hour?
“Let’s get smashed.”
How does a pumpkin listen to Halloween music?
“On vine-yl.
What did George Strait say to the pumpkin?
“I’m Here for a Gourd Time.”
Why was the jack-o’-lantern afraid?
“It had no guts.”
Pumpkin Pick Up Lines (Funny, Dirty, Cheesy)
“Will you be my pumpkin?”
“I love pun-pkins.”
“Don’t be so root, learn some manners.”
“I don’t want to Leaf you alone…”
“I’m a little bit of a country pumpkin.”
“Let me plant one on ya!”
Related: Halloween Dad Jokes
“Get pumped for Halloween!”
“I wet my plants.”
“Let’s give ’em pumpkin to talk about.”
“Plant a kiss on me.”
“I’m sexy and I grow it.”
Satisfying Pumpkin Jokes One Liners
What do you call a fat pumpkin?
“A pumpkin!”
What did the gourd say to the other gourd after running into each other?
“Sorry for Pumpkin in to you!”
What do you call several gourds related to each other?
“Pump kin.”
How do pumpkins summon ghosts?
“Using an Ouija Gourd.”
What do you call the leader of the gourds?
“Pumpking.”
Related: Dirty Halloween Jokes For Adults
What do you call a pumpkin carrying a baton?
“A security gourd.”
What do you call a person who identifies as a gourd?
“A Pump-Kin!”
What indoor sport do gourds play to stay in shape when it’s snowing outside?
“Winter Squash.”
Dirty Pumpkin Jokes and One-liners
“Slipped on a pumpkin today. It caught me off gourd.”
“Orange you pumped for Halloween?”
Where do pumpkins hold meetings?
“In the gourdroom.”
What do hillbillys do during halloween?
“They Pumpkin”
“Only two days into October and now even COVID is pumpkin spiced.”
Related: Best Witch Puns, Jokes & Riddles For Halloween
What do you call carving a pumpkin in September?
“Premature ejackolantern.”
Coffee is acidic. Until you add pumpkin and spices…
“Then it becomes basic.”
What’s the only vegetable you can inflate?
“A Pump-kin.”
Fall Pumpkin Jokes (Fun for Fall!)
“Oh my gourd. I love fall.”
What do pumpkins eat at the movies?
“Pulp Corn.”
What’s orange and goes choo-choo?
“A Pumpkin in Train-ing.”
What kind of animal loves pumpkins?
“Orange-atans.”
Why did the pumpkin cross the road?
“It fell off the wagon!”
Cute Pumpkin Jokes
What did the pumpkin say to the jack-o-lantern?
“Got a light?”
What’s the best thing to put in a piece of pumpkin pie?
“Your teeth!”
Why did the pumpkin turn red?
“Because it saw the salad dressing.”
How do pumpkins get up to the roof?
“They use a jack-o-ladder.”
Related: Fang-Tastic Halloween Knock Knock Jokes
What do jack-o-lanterns in the city call the backwoods pumpkins?
“Country Bumpkins.”
What did the jack-o-lantern say to the annoying pumpkin?
“Cut it out.”
Cheesy Pumpkin Jokes
When is a pumpkin not a pumpkin?
“When you drop it, then it’s squash.”
“Beauty is in the pie of the beholder.”
“Cutie pie”
“I only have pies for you.”
“I spy with my little pie.”
Related: Halloween Jokes And Riddles
“I’ve got my eyes on the pies.”
“Pie love spending time with you.”
“Pie’ve been waiting all season for this.”
Why don’t pumpkins get into arguments?
“Because they have no stomach for fighting.”
What kind of romance do pumpkins enjoy?
“A mushy romance.”
What did the farmer say when his gourds went missing?
“There’s pumpkin strange happening here.”
What are the most attractive pumpkins called?
“They are gourdgeous.”
Why do jack-o-lanterns sit on the porch?
“Because they don’t have hands to open the front door.”
Pumpkin Jokes For Adults
What’s the ratio of a pumpkin’s circumference to its diameter?
“Pumpkin pi.”
What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport?
“Squash.”
Why was Cinderella sticky at the ball?
“Because she went there in a pumpkin!”
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite Western?
“The Gourd, The Bad, and The Ugly.”
Why was Cinderella bad at football?
“She had a pumpkin for a coach.”
Why was the jack-o’-lantern so forgetful?
“Because he’s empty-headed.”
Dumb Pumpkin Jokes
What did the orange pumpkin say to the green pumpkin?
“Why orange you orange?”
What did the pumpkin say to the pie maker?
“Wouldn’t you rather use apples?”
What did the orange pumpkin say to the green pumpkin?
“Are you feeling ill?”
We hope you liked our Pumpkin Jokes and riddles, if you want you can also explore more jokes here.
Moreover, check out these riddles, and memes on food, love, animal, and holiday to get more ideas to suit different moods and situations.
Related Topics:
Funny Halloween Jokes That Will Never Get Old
October Jokes And Riddles
Funny Jokes For Adults
Best Dark Humor Jokes No Limit
Biology Jokes
One Liner Jokes For Adults