Pick suitable funny Thanksgiving greetings for cards that fit your requirements.
Table of Contents
Short Funny Thanksgiving Messages
“Pie makes everybody happy.” Laurie Halse Anderson
“Thanksgiving, man. Not a good day to be my pants.” Kevin James
“We may not have it all together, but together, we have it all.”
“I’m from Canada, so Thanksgiving to me is just Thursday with more food.” Howie Mandel
“I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.” Erma Bombeck
“If you think about a Thanksgiving dinner, it’s really like making a large chicken.” Ina Garten
“People who love to eat are always the best people.” Julia Child
“Coexistence: What the farmer does with the turkey—until Thanksgiving.” Mike Connolly
“A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen.” Kin Hubbard
“An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.” Irv Kupcinet
“I can’t cook a Thanksgiving dinner. All I can make is cold cereal and maybe toast.” Charlie Brown
“Cooking tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out.” Nicole Hollander
Funny Thanksgiving Messages For Friends
“After a good dinner, one can forgive anybody, even one’s own relations.” Oscar Wilde
“It wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without a little emotional scarring.” Timothy Burke, “Friends”
“Good mashed potato is one of the great luxuries of life.” Lindsey Bareham
“Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftover in aluminum foil and throw them out.” Nicole Hollander
Funny Thanksgiving Messages Greetings
“Thanksgiving is so called because we are all so thankful that it only comes once a year.” P.J. O’Rourke
“Happy Thanksgiving to my family and friends. I’m thankful for many things, but you guys top the list.”
“For those of you who cannot be with family this Thanksgiving, please resist the urge to brag.” Andy Borowitz
“Wherever you go this Thanksgiving, and whoever you spend it with, I hope it’s wonderful.”
“Thanksgiving is a time to count your blessings, one by one, as each relative goes home.” Melanie White
“Hope your Thanksgiving Day brings you an extra helping of joy.”
“I suppose I will die never knowing what pumpkin pie tastes like when you have room for it.” Robert Brault
“Happy Thanksgiving to the people who make me thankful to be me.”
“Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother’s tasted better the day before.” Rita Rudner.
Funny Thanksgiving Messages To Colleagues | Coworkers
“May your turkey be moist, your mashed potatoes creamy, and your coworkers not too crazy!”
“Wishing you a Thanksgiving feast so epic, it’s like a Black Friday sale for your taste buds!”
“May your Thanksgiving dinner be as drama-free as a group Zoom call with the mute button on.”
“Here’s to a day of gratitude and elastic waistbands! Happy Thanksgiving!”
“May your cranberry sauce be more delightful than awkward family conversations.”
“Wishing you a Thanksgiving as sweet as pie and as smooth as gravy.”
“Enjoy your turkey coma—just remember, the struggle to button your pants is real.”
“Wishing you a day filled with joy, laughter and strategically timed food comas.”
“May your gravy boat runneth over and your in-laws stay in their lane. Happy Thanksgiving!”
“May your wine glass stay full and your awkward encounters with coworkers stay empty.”
“Wishing you a Thanksgiving as relaxing as accidentally falling asleep after the feast.”
“May your plate be as full as your heart, and your pie slices even fuller!”
“Remember, calories at the Thanksgiving table don’t count—until your scale reminds you!”
“Wishing you a Thanksgiving feast so delicious, even your diet decides to take the day off.”
“Enjoy your day off work, because dealing with family is a job of its own! Happy Thanksgiving!”
“May your holiday be filled with gratitude, joy, and a strategic game plan for Black Friday shopping!”
Funny Thanksgiving Messages To Employees
“Wishing you a Thanksgiving filled with joy, gratitude, and an extra helping of pumpkin pie! Enjoy your day.”
“May your heart be as full as your plate this Thanksgiving! Happy feasting! [Company Name]”
“Wishing you a Thanksgiving that’s as sweet as pie! Your efforts are the icing on our corporate cake.”
“Gobble ’til you wobble! Happy Thanksgiving from our workplace family to yours.”
“As we count our blessings, know that you’re one of them. Happy Thanksgiving!” – [Company Name]
“Wishing you a Thanksgiving as wonderful as the aroma of a freshly baked pie.” – [Company Name]
“Happy Thanksgiving to our hardworking and dedicated employees. We’re thankful for you.”
“Thanksgiving is about counting our blessings. We’re grateful for the dedication you bring to our team.”
“We’re thankful for our team, and we hope your Thanksgiving is filled with warmth and happiness.”- [Company Name]
Funny Thanksgiving Quotes For A Smile
“You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out.” Jay Leno
“If you start drinking now, Thanksgiving could be a lot of fun.” Conan O’Brien
“Cut my pie into four pieces, I don’t think I could eat eight.” Yogi Berra
“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.” George Burns
“A lot of Thanksgivings have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen.” Kin Hubbard
“The only thing I like better than talking about food is eating.” John Walters
“Happy Thanksgiving!!! Or as I like to call it: Cheat Day.” Hugh Jackman
“Thank you, the day after Thanksgiving, or as the makers of sweatpants call it, ‘the busy season.'” Jimmy Fallon
“I’m giving thanks that we don’t have to go through this for another year.” Adele Larson, “Home for the Holidays”
“Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie.” Jim Davis
Funny Thanksgiving Quotes From Movies
“We should just be thankful for being together. I think that’s what they mean by ‘Thanksgiving.’” A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving, 1965.
“The Thanksgiving Day Parade was first on the list.” Seinfeld, 1994.
“Safety never takes a holiday.” Paul Blart: Mall Cop, 2009.
“November is all I know and all I ever want to know.” Sweet November, 2001.
“We’re just gonna watch football, drink beer, and then we’re going to Best Buy later for Black Friday.” New Girl, 2011.
“Ah, Thanksgiving. The most wonderful time of the year… unless, of course, you’re a turkey!” Turkey Hollow, 2015.
“I swear to you, this will be your most memorable Thanksgiving, the one that you’ll want the rest of your life.” Funny People, 2009.
“Every year I try and tell you guys that no one really sings Thanksgiving songs.” Bob’s Burgers, 2013.
“Well, are you spending Thanksgiving with your family? We have a ramble turkey. Eat all you want.” The Blind Side, 2009.
“Where’s the rum ham?” It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, 2011.
“It ain’t cool being no jive turkey, so close to Thanksgiving.” Trading Places, 1983.
“Here I am, 5 a.m., stuffing bread crumbs up a dead bird’s butt.” Rosanne, 1989.
“There’s no Santa in the Cole’s Thanksgiving Day parade.” Miracle on 34th Street, 1994.
“Eat us! Hey, it’s Thanksgiving day. Eat us! We make a nice buffet.” Addams Family Values, 1993.
“Thanksgiving is cookies! Thanksgiving is pie-filling! Thanksgiving is coleslaw!” Garfield’s Thanksgiving, 1989.
“It’s not yet Thanksgiving and we’re enjoying our lovely fall weather.” Grumpy Old Men, 1998.
“Dads gettin’ drunk on Thanksgiving is a holiday tradition.” Family Guy, 2011.